Hello Sanctuary! While cruising through you guys emails I still see alot of people asking for relationship advice. As always I will try and do my best and answering them from my experiences of dating. This is JiNX’s top 10 things you shouldn’t compromise for a relationship.
1) I may not be perfect, but I’m pretty damn special: It’s very easy to find someone that can look you in the eyes and say I love you, but do they sincerely mean it? One day you’ll finally meet that person, but it’s important not to rush or settle. The biggest thing about dating is that you can tell him/her your life story and what you like without being judge or being frowned upon on. Find someone that isn’t going to be afraid to say they miss you or they worry about losing you. Their actions should show their love for you, not just words. Remember, someone that’s truly in love with you will always stick by you through life obstacles. Not because they’re blind about your faults, but knowing your faults and believe your still pretty freaking awesome!
2) Ability to make your own decisions: When you’re a couple yes it’s best to communicate with each other when making certain decision, but not every single one. Example: My gf Paige says she’s going to travel back to Louisiana to visit her friends and family. That was it for thay conversation. Obviously, every situation can’t be like this def if you have kids then yeah there’s some planning to do. In my case there’s no kids. She a grown woman if you wants to go visit her family and friends then that’s perfectly fine. They’re some couples that one partner had all the control and dictate everything their partners does and in some extremes cases make decisions for them of what they can wear or not. This is a no-go.
3) Your need to be understood: Couples needs this space of mutual understanding. Communication IS the relationship. There needs to be ground rules clearly on dos and don’ts. Just because it may not bother you some it may bother your partner alot! Both sides got to be able to hear each other out without getting too defensive or offended on what their partners have to say.
4) Freedom to love. Yourself: Pretty self explanatory, I don’t care how much of a perfect match you may think your partner is, but they’re not a carbon copy of you! You’re gonna be different, so with that being said don’t let no one try and change you in hopes to mold you into their version of a perfect spouse. If they can’t 100% without a doubt love you for who you are they deserve 0% of you. If you do, you’ll get lost and your whole identity will be gone.
5) Experimenting with Life: If anyone tell you they know everything about themselves they’re are lying straight to your face. Never be in a relationship that your partner doesn’t allow you to try new things. They’re stunting your growth and pursuit to live your life fully.
6) Never let the devil steal your joy: Whatever makes you happy do it with our without your partner. You don’t want to be on your death bed and realize that your life was nothing but running errands, casual meetings and empty promises.
7) Other Important Relationships: For the sake of yourself never ever let anyone tell you who you can talk to and who you can’t. It’s foolish to throw away friendships for the sake of one person. Why be with someone who censors your life? Doesn’t sound like trust at all.
8) Your Inner Peace: Unfortunately, people that you know directly and indirectly will love you see you miserable. I’ve experienced this personally from my last relationship. People that I’ve sat down and ate with verbally assualting me. They will attack you verbally or non verbally just to upset you and drag you into a guilt trip. Don’t fall victim of this. Let karma work is magic and continue to do what makes you happy. As hard as it is, you have to let go of that person, so you can be at peace.
9) Your Self Respect/Worth: At no time during a relationship you should feel like you’re competing with someone else for your partner love. Don’t listen to any excuse they may have, it’s irrelevant. If they can’t be committed to you 100% then they deserve 0% because there’s someone out there that will adore you. To them you will be all they need at the end of the day.
10) Space: You don’t have to spend every single activity together to grow as a couple. Going into a relationship, each party is going to have their certain set of friends. Sure is great to hangout all together your partner, but sometimes people need go out with their friends or do something without you. Don’t take it personally, if you don’t allow space your partner can feel trap and will want them to exit the relationship all together.
Sound Off! Is there anything that I missed? Let me know in the comment section below!